Man, I HATE Duke

So getting sick sucked, but it meant getting to see a game at two of the most prominent college basketball programs in the country, Duke and North Carolina. Everything happens for a reason.......

Saturday I showed up at Cameron Indoor Stadium, to see the Duke Blue Devils take on the St. John's Red Storm. The subject of much debate between KU and Duke fans, Cameron is 'supposedly' the best arena in the country to see a college basketball game (KU fans would argue that Allen Fieldhouse is #1). So, with a completely partial view, I went in with high expectations AND an extreme hatred of Duke. I was blown away.

I will only say this once and it pains me to admit it, but I have to say that Cameron IS the best place to see a basketball game in the country. Sigh. There are a few reasons that make it unique/special:
- It is a small arena... capacity is only 9,300 (compare to 16k-20k for most major program arenas) and they PACK you in - luckily no one sat next to me because otherwise I would have had to put my legs ON the person sitting in front of me.
- The facilities were completely OLD SCHOOL - built in 1940 and barely renovated since....lots of charm. The entrance I went through made it feel like I was going to church or the opera or something. Please note: I have ever been to an opera, this example was used for illustrative purposes only.
- The students (aka the Cameron Crazies) get the best seats in the house - the first 8 rows of one complete side of the arena! Most universities understandably reserve these seats for alumni with deep pockets. But, Duke's decision to give these to the students gives them a distinct home court advantage.

Since the students are practically ON the court and because the arena is so small, the cohesiveness and volume of the chants/cheers is like nothing I have ever seen.....again, I have to apologize to all of my Jayhawk comrades. Also, the Cameron Crazies are pretty damn creative for rich, white kids. Some standout things I noticed:
- When opponent's players are announced, they all say in unison (while waving): "Hi Jamal" in a real sarcastic tone
- New free throw distraction tactics that made me laugh out loud: counting down from 10 really quickly; making sexual groaning noises
- When the opponent comes on the floor, they put the 'hex' on them by pointing their arms and chanting 'uhhhhhh'........and they do it not just for 15 seconds, but for like 5 minutes straight.

It just really amazed me how pumped everybody was throughout the whole game. The game was essentially over with about 10 minutes to go in the first half and yet the crowd was still in it. They were yelling 'Defense' with 75 seconds left to go in the game and Duke up by 30. WHAT?! Incredible. Man, I hate Duke.....................

That evening I went out in Chapel Hill for delicious pizza and wine on Franklin St. with an old Jamba friend, Hannah Pask. Her dog Zeke (Nasty) unfortunately wouldn't sit still long enough, but that is a 'Tar Heels' bib that he has on. Yeah, college basketball is big in this area.



Sunday night, I saw the North Carolina Tar Heels take on the Wake Forest Demon Deacons. Wow, talk about a totally different experience. While North Carolina has a deep tradition like Duke and KU, the Dean Dome (their 22,000 seat arena) doesn't hold a candle to Cameron or Allen Fieldhouse. Sure, it was fun to see former KU coach/demi-god Roy Williams barking on the sideline and Player of the Year candidate Tyler Hansborough making some unbelievable moves, but the crowd was practically asleep at times during the game. And it's not like North Carolina plays boring basketball - Roy's teams always play a very entertaining, up-tempo game (oh, how I miss the days when Roy coached at KU). It was still a much better atmosphere than Memphis and Ole Miss, but the architecture/size of the arena makes all the difference.



Next stop: Virginia.

South Carolina - a great place to have the flu!

Recent commercial on daytime television:
Mom: "Gosh, I would love to go on vacation, but I just don't know where to go...."
Kid #1: "Yeah, I'm tired of always going to Florida, I wish there was somewhere else we could go..."
Kid #2: "Mom, I don't feel good"
Announcer: "Tired of the same old boring vacation spot? Have you or one of your family members recently contacted the flu? Well then I have got the place just for you....... South Carolina! Enjoy king sized beds and deluxe television screens, while you sleep 14 hours a day, eat dry toast and enjoy tea, soup and as many liquids as you can possibly put in your body. Let the staff (Aunt Pam and Uncled Ed) cater to your every need and enjoy nice views of golf courses and marshy land, as you recover....just in time to leave!"

So, I didn't exactly get to enjoy much of the splendor that is South Carolina, but if I was going to get sick this was DEFINITELY the place to do it....in style. My AP and UE were awesome and put up with my ridiculousness for nearly a week. Major props to AP and UE.

I did get the royal tour of their island (by cart no less) and I can say that I am definitely not ready to retire to this lifestyle yet.... highlights of the week:
- Dinner at the country club - I wore my best "Rodney Dangerfield in Caddyshack outfit" and fit in so well that I thought this 65 year old lady was going to try to jump my bones. She had a major case of Andrewsitis..... and with a quick look at the competition (all old wrinkly dudes), I can understand why.
- Seeing the movie Juno in Hilton Head. Oh my gosh, if you haven't seen this movie, see it. Best movie of the year. I am in love with Ellen Page.
- Eating a delicious Peanut Butter and Oreo Blizzard.......I'm stretching here. I literally spent about 40% of my time there awake. :)

The one good thing about getting sick is that it changed my schedule and I got to see a Duke AND North Carolina basketball game! More details on that to follow. Happy Tuesday suckers.

The ATL

Hey y'all! Sorry, I've been fixin' to do some postin' for the past few days, but I caught myself a good ole fashioned flu. It was not pretty. And I am going to describe it in full detail. First, I started losing all..........................................well, I guess I'll spare you the details, but let's just say I spent more time in bed than John Holmes.....except I didn't get to have as much fun.

I rolled into the ATL (Dirty South! WHAT WHAT?!) on Thursday evening and met up with my friend Benton Marshall Smith III, his wife Meredith and their lovely kids Brooke (cute girl above in horrible cheerleading outfit) and Cole. Benton and I became friends in our tenure at Jamba Juice Company and while we really didn't work together that much, we developed a lot of skits, songs and videos for the multiple brand conferences that we hosted. Not only is Ben extremely hilarious and outgoing, but so is his wife Meredith. Together they form one of the funniest/most entertaining one-two punch in couple history.

That evening we enjoyed dinner at a local catfish place and Ben got me caught up on all of the wonderful happenings at his new employer, Fantastic Sam's (a hair salon business in the South and Midwest). I seriously don't need to write any jokes about this, because the fact that Ben works there is funny enough.

On Valentine's Day, I did a little work in the morning/afternoon (huh?!) and went for a run through the campus of Ben's alma mater, Emory. Ben always likes to talk about how it is one of the top 15 universities in the country and I always like to remind him that everyone outside of Atlanta thinks that Emory is the same thing as Devry (go Jayhawks!). For dinner, Ben cooked up some of his world famous JAMBAlaya (in tribute to our former employer?)..... here are the scores: Grub (4 out of 5); Beck (2 out of 5 - hey, it was their kitchen); Deluise (1 out of 5: very healthy!). Seeing as how it was Valentine's Day, I suggested that the two of them go out while I watch the kids. After laughing for about 15 minutes straight, they asked, 'oh, were you serious?'. Instead, Ben and I went and got some beers at a couple of his old college haunts (Moe's & Joe's, Neighbor's) and then ended up at a strip club....... yes........on Valentine's Day. Extremely romantic!

Those of you who know me know that strip clubs are not my thing. I have never really understood the allure of going to a room where there are a bunch of naked women with no ultimate conclusion. It's kind of like going to a Krispy Kreme, watching the delicious smelling rings of yeast come slowly down the conveyor belt, seeing the ooey gooey sugar get dribbled all over them and then saying, "Gosh, I really want a donut....but f*ck it, I've got a four month old ho-ho in the car". Plus, of course it is degrading to women.

BUT, my friend Ben is a big fan (of the 3 strip clubs that I have been to in my life, 2 of them have been with him) and I figured I would get all kinds of great stories for the bloggity blogs5! Yeah. Unfortunately, not so much. Of the 5-7 women who came out on stage, only 1 of them was really very attractive. Overall the clientele was pretty much as you would expect.... a mixture of truck drivers, thugsters, ministers and community activists. The club did have one thing going for it though - the stereotypical DJ saying things really fast like, "All right everybody put your hands together for Cannnnnndyyyy". And, we made it out of there with Ben only spending about $40.

The next day, I woke up feeling like donkey, but we pressed on to some of the touristy spots in Atlanta. First stop, the world's LARGEST aquarium! The highlight was when Ben tried to talk the parking attendant down from the clearly stated $10 price... you kind of had to be there, but it was classic BS. Here is a photo we snuck of the cheesy photo that the aquarium tries to make you buy for $20:


After that,we checked out the World of Coke museum! I may or may not have gotten scared at the '4-D' movie.....
We had lunch at an institution, the Varsity.....chili cheese dogs, hamburgers, onion rings. Apparently this one location does over $17 Million per year! Selling $1.25 hamburgers?! The scores: Grub (3.5 out of 5: solidly good); Beck (5 out of 5: multiple rooms with lots of character, is a mixture of businessmen, blue collar, school kids, all walks of life); Deluise (5 out of 5: when is chili cheese EVER a good idea?).


That evening, I shaved down to the stash so that Meredith could officially be seen around town with the "Great Moustachio Brothers (tm)". We dined at a very nice Italian place called Ecco and quickly made a friend:


Saturday I woke up at 3:30pm (after sleeping for 15 hours straight) and somehow conjured up enough energy to drive to South Carolina with a fever of like 104. Thank God. I would have hated to burden my friends with the flu miserableness that I encountered the next 3 days. Lucky for my Aunt Pam and Uncle Ed, I got to burden them instead!

South Carolina adventures (while limited due to illness) to be updated soon.......

Oh, one last thing guys. You have got to check out the best song that I have heard in the South. It's by a guy named Steve Holy and he's got himself a "Brand New Girlfriend". Click on the link. Do it. Do it. Ok, now that you've heard this...... remember how I said that New Country was the fourth worth genre of music? Now you know HOW BAD REGGAETON IS!

I'll take a fried peanut butter and banana sandwich please. Oh, and 3 Thorazines.

So what would a trip to Memphis be without a trip to the King's house?! On my way out of the town, I stopped by what is considered Mecca by many Elvis fans, Graceland. Quick "did you know facts" about Graceland:
1) Elvis actually did not name Graceland, "Graceland": he inherited the name from the previous owners
2) Elvis had 3 televisions set up side by side in his media room so that he could watch all 3 networks at the SAME TIME. whoa.
3) Elvis was actually really into racquetball and even built an indoor court on the property......... apparently this was many years before he became 'Fat Elvis'

On Monday afternoon, I rolled into the great state of Mississippi. By great I mean, well, um, ok, it pretty much sucks. According to the internets, the state came very close to winning the triple crown last year (in other words, finishing last in income, last in education and first in obesity). I spent my time in Oxford, which is home to the University of Mississippi or "Ole Miss" as it is affectionately called. I think I repeated the phrase "Ole Miss" in a Southern accent about 150 times that day. Say it out loud and tell me that's not funny!

Ole Miss has a decent campus with lots of brick buildings and a pretty nice open field where the kids can congregate. Went to a game Monday night - the "Running Rebs" (again hilarious!) took on the mighty Presbyterian Blue Hose (who had a 4-21 record entering the game). Man, talk about bad basketball. 1,500 other frustrated fans and I sat through a miserable display of round ball. Ole Miss should have won the game by about 50, but played so poorly they only won by 11. Nice thing about the game being so empty was that you could actually hear blood vessels in Ole Miss head coach Andy Kennedy's forehead popping during the game. I thought he was going to go Bobby Knight on a couple of his players.

This morning, I completed my Elvis tour with a quick stop by his birthplace in Tupelo, MS. At the King's 2 bedroom shack, I was greeted by an old feller that was really, really nice. In fact, he was too nice. When I shook his hand, he wouldn't let go. For like 3 minutes. Reminded me of the old dude in Family Guy - I was just waiting this guy to ask if I wanted to see his popsicle collection in the basement.

Tonight, I escaped a massive thunderstorm in Tuscaloosa (home of the University of Alabama - now THAT'S a nice campus) and got safely into Birmingham. Was planning to head down to the Five Points South district but then realized I got a flat tire. Dum dum dum.... Bummer. I had to scrap my plans and walk to the Full Moom BBQ across the street to get a taste of Alabama. The scores: Grub (2 out of 5 - mediocre!); Beck (2 out of 5 - decorated in football crap, bad); Deluise (6 out of 5 - what's that called when you feel like you have mucus in your heart?).

Manana, I head for the ATL to hang out with an old partner-in-crime Benton Marshall Smith and his lovely family. Happy early Valentine's Day los suckers.

Basketball and Barbeque Tour is Officially Underway

The trip to the "dirty" South officially began Friday with a relatively painless 10 hour drive. Quite surprising considering the fact that most of the time was spent driving through Missouruh, the armpit state to the right of Kansas. You see, Missouruh is home to my alma mater's bitter rival, the Mizzou Tigers. Assuming the billboards on the highway are representative, a degree from the University of Missouri can lead to a career in any of the state's main industries:

- Guns and Ammo

- Fireworks

- Adult Videos/Book Stores

Wow. I am SO happy I went to KU.

Making the trip extremely pleasant was that my bitchen rental car, the Dodge Avenger (or DAve as I call it) has satellite radio. Also, I got an IPhone on Thursday*. So, 10 hours of indie and gangsta rap combined with web surfing made for a fun for me, dangerous for others ride.

While I was planning to drive all the way to Memphis before eating, I stumbled upon a place in southern Missouri that I had seen on the Food Channel. Billboard after billboard called me (it was like divine intervention) to Lambert's, the self annointed "home of throwed rolls". Grammar is apparently not important in Missouruh either. For my trip to the South I have decided to rate meals on a scale of 1 to 5 on three basic criteria:

- The Grub Factor - "Quality/taste of food"

- The Beck Factor - "Authenticity of concept/atmosphere, fun factor"

- The Dom Deluise Factor - "Potential of having a heart attack on premise"

After catching a couple of rolls (yes, they really do throw them), I settled into a (as promised) extremely salty ham steak. It came with all the fixins' such as mac & cheese & tomato, fried okra and mashed potatoes and fried potatoes. Pure delicousness. And the lady playing the piano old-time style next to me made me feel like I was at home. Final scores: Grub (4 out of 5); Beck (5 out of 5); Deluise (5 out of 5 - I seriously felt my heart skip a beat after my meal).

With a full belly, I pulled into Memphis at about 10pm and was blown away yet again. While not the most convenient location, the Hyatt Place is one of the nicest hotels I have ever been in..... for $99 a night. Recently remodeled with a sectional couch, pillowtop bed and 42 inch plasma in every room. I gotta throw a Lil John, "WHAT?!" out there. Incredible.

After a luxurious night sleep, I got up Saturday morning and headed to downtown Memphis to see the #1 college basketball team in the land, the Memphis Tigers, battle the lowly UCF Horned Crocodiles**.

You know how they say, 'everyone in the South is nice'? Wow, they weren't kidding. I had 'brunch' at a place before the game called Big Foot Lodge. The food was nothing special, but the bartender Joe was AWESOME. Although busy, he chatted with me nearly the whole time and filled me on places to eat, tips for bball tickets, etc. Ridiculously cool dude.

I decided to scalp tickets for the game and get this.... they were $7! #1 team in the nation and you can watch them for $7?! Sure they were upper deck seats, but they were decent. Huh?!

The game itself was pretty much a snoozer. Memphis slept walk through the first half and eventually put their lowly opponents out of their misery in the second half, winning 85-64. The atmosphere was nothing compared to Allen Fieldhouse (home of the Jayhawks). The highlight was getting to sit with the family that scalped me the ticket, the Pattons (see above and yes, they are 'kin' to General Patton). I got all kinds of great tips on places to eat, but I believe the youngest Patton, Summer, had the best comment: "in the South we're all about barbeque...well, that and meat and taters". Well said, Summer. Well said. Check this out - they actually SAW the tornado that passed through last week. Jealous!

Post-game I decided to hit up the historic and colorful Beale street, the 'home of the blues'.......... and also home to about 50 bars trying to exploit the fact that it is the 'home of the blues'. I walked into a fine establishment that enticed me with $1 beers. I ended up spending about $12 too much over the next 4 hours and jawing with a dude originally from Iowa who had just moved to Memphis from LA. Cool dude, although if I was ever going to make it back to the hotel, I had to get out of there and get some food. BBQ time.

I decided to hit up the landmark restaurant"Charles Vergo's Rendezvous" based on multiple raves. Mind you, I was a little blasted when I ate the meal but I had the same feeling that I had at the Memphis Tigers game..... "OVERRATED". I had the rib plate (dry) and here are my scores: Grub (2 out of 5); Beck (5 out of 5 - awesome space; in true Memphis fashion, a girl named Brandy*** chatted me up throughout my entire meal); Deluise (4 out of 5 - cardiac potential, but not TOO greasy).

Sunday, I played tourist and hit up several Memphis institutions. Among them:

- The National Civil Rights Museum: quick history lesson, MLK Jr was shot in Memphis. How many of you remembered that?! They preserved the facade of the hotel where he was shot and had a museum inside the motel. Really powerful, moving stuff. Thank God we didn't have to grow up in an era where ignorance was even more rampant than it is now.

- The Gibson Guitar Factory Tour: Tour took 10 minutes and cost $10. The tour guide was the son of that guy who talked really fast on the FedEx commercials in the 80s. We got to see first hand why the Chinese will soon be making all of the world's guitars......this model of efficiency puts out a whole 250 guitars a week. Wow!

- Sun Records: This was actually really cool. The spot where Elvis, Johnny Cash (as seen in Walk the Line), Buddy Holly, even U2 recorded a lot of music. It hasn't been updated and still has the same look as the 50s.

- BB King's Blues Bar - saw a Sharon Jones wanna be belt out some tunes while an 85 year old dude wailed away on a guitar that looked like it belonged in a Metallica video.

Capped it all off with a trip to another highly recommended barbeque joint.... Central BBQ. Wow, this was the type of bbq I had been waiting for - I had the combo plate (ribs, pork, turkey, mac & cheese and onion rings). And the scores: Grub (4.5 out of 5 - wow, the turkey was some of the best I have ever had. Would have gotten a 5 if the mac & cheese didn't suck); Beck (4.5 out of 5 - the floors were literally slippery from all the grease.... you can't beat that; only thing keeping it from a 5 were all of the white people all over the place); Deluise (5 out of 5 - I am seriously having chest pains as I type this).

Whew, what an eventful weekend. If you are still reading this, I am shocked and amazed. You should probably get back to work right about........NOW. Next stop for me is Oxford, Mississippi home of the Ole Miss Runnin' Rebs. Peace out.

* This is quite possibly the coolest piece of technology I have purchased since I bought my first phonograph machine. It has already changed my life.

** This is not the actual school mascot, but it might as well be. They suck.

*** This was SERIOUSLY her name. I can't make this stuff up - it's too good! See picture #2..

The Unofficial Official South America Recap

Ah, how time flies when you're having fun......... and not on meth. Our tour of South America is officially over, but the bloggity blogsfive........must.......go........on......... Speaking of fives, I present to you the top five lists compiled on the trip. Enjoy.

Top Five Best Events (in no particular order)
1) Whitewater rafting outside of Cusco
2) The 20 mile hike outside of El Chalten
3) The Cicuito Chico bike ride in Bariloche
4) Clubs in BA - Bahrein and Niceto nightclubs
5) Spa in El Chalten
Honorable mention:
- Chocolate cake at the top of Catedral outside Bariloche
- Machu Picchu/Sacred Valley (would have made top 5 if weather was better)
- Walking on Perito Merino glacier
- Beating up those old people at the senior center in Lima....man they had it coming

Top Five Best Cultural Experiences
1) Watching a cute brother/sister duo dressed in traditional Peruvian clothing doing a song and dance number in Ollantaytambo. They had these 'pained' expressions on their faces, which made them infinitely more adorable than they already were.
2) Tango at the Milonga in BA on New Year's. 65 year olds kickin' it at 5am? Seriously?!
3) Having lunch with a school girl outside Bariloche. She was trying to learn English and although we had only a quick chat, when she left, she sought out all of us in the restaurant to give us a little peck on the cheek (and say goodbye). Precious.
4) The Saturday market in Lima. Chaotic. Tons of short people. Bottles, cans, clap your hands.
5) Dunkin Donuts in downtown Lima. They had these pink donuts with sprinkles on them. You just can't get that anywhere else.

Top Five Best Meals
What makes a great meal? It isn't always JUST about the quality of the food or the level of service. Sometimes it is the people you are with, the frame of mind or the circumstances leading up to the meal, company shared, the amount of wine consumed, etc.
1) BA: Bar Uriarte - Great company, comfy couches, delicious food and wine
2) BA: Green Bamboo - Yummy waitresses, gorgeous Vietnamese food
3) Cusco: Cicciolina - Delicious tapas; the only really GOOD dining experience for us in Cusco
4) BA: Olsen - Not the best brunch in the world, but unlike Morrissey, this place will have you wishing that "Everyday is like Sunday" as you chew on your waffles and sip on Chandon
5) El Chalten: La Cerveceria - Grub food for a brewery and a FUN place to escape the cold
Honorable Mention:
- BA: Casa Cruz - fancy but not too pretentious, felt like a place that Tony Montana (Scarface) would eat
- Lima: Astrid y Gaston - good Peruvian food with an upscale twist
- BA: Bar 6 - they may not have the best steak, but they know how to dress it (mine was dressed in a nice pink blouse)

Top Five Worst Smells (Update)
1) My sneakers after the El Chalten hike (and for the next 3 weeks)
2) El Calafate hostel
3) Aquas Calientes hostel
4) Dog crap on every street and the 'ocean' in BA
5) South American women.....just kidding.....sort of

Top Five Worst Musical Genres (as voted on by MCA and BriJames)
1) Reggaeton - this was popular all throughout the Southland. This genre has ONE drum beat. ONE!!! For an entire genre of music! And it was stuck in our heads the entire trip! Ahhhh!!!! And the fashion (in the videos) is horrible. Take off those f*cking ridiculous ladies sunglasses!!
2) Showtunes - seriously if you like this kind of Celine Dion/Bette Midler crap, we may need to revisit our friendship and discuss where it's going......
3) Tejano - No offense to the Mexican people, but this music is really no bueno. At least it has more than one damn drum beat. Man I hate Reggaeton!!!!
4) New Country - This is Tim McGraw and Trisha Underwood's proudest moment - not finishing in the top 3 on this list.
5) Smooth Jazz - Sadly, John Tesh and Kenny G would be a welcome substitution for any of the genres above.........ESPECIALLY REGGAETON!!!!

Quick stats:
- Trains (2), Planes (8) and Automobiles (57+)
- Number of pieces of poo stepped in: 5
- Most hours slept in one night: 13 (BJ)
- Least hours slept in one night: 1 (Both, BA to Lima)
- Amount of times we feared for our lives: 0

For the legions of fans of the bloggity blogs5, not to fear. You will get your fill of ridiculousness ALL THROUGHOUT THE MONTH OF FEBRUARY. That's right friends, you will get the pleasure of following me to such exciting and glamorous locales as:
Memphis, TN; Oxford, MS; Birmingham, AL; The ATL; Buford, SC; Raleigh, NC; Charlottesville, VA; Morgantown, WV; Columbus, OH; Indianapolis, IN; Chicago, IL; Des Moines, IA

Trip begins this Friday! Sayonara Suckers!!

Mother Nature 1, Team Andrews/Taylor 0

Wednesday, the culmination of our 5 week journey: Machu Picchu (see above for stock photo). Quick history lesson: MP was an Inca village that was abandoned when the Spaniards took over the show in the mid 1500s. It had become overrun by jungle growth and was not re-discovered until 1912 by a dude named Hiram Bircham. He was looking for the lost city of Paititi which according to legend contains several Inca treasures hidden from the Spaniards when they rose to power. Instead he found MP.

After 5 restless hours of sleep at a hostel ranked “#1 Musty Hostel in the World 2001-2006”, we awakened at 5am to the tune of moshi mumblio speak and jumped on ANOTHER bus to get to the entrance of MP. In total, that makes 2 planes, 2 buses, 1 train, 1 rickshaw and a donkey ride. Whew. I guess it could be worse - some hippies hiked the Inca trail in the rain for 4+ days (paying $500+) to get to MP. Yeah, um, no thanks.

We were pretty pumped as we entered the gates, ready to see some of the most spectacular views of our life. Unfortunately when we got into the park, all we could see was…….......... not what you see above. SUCK! It was so foggy it was like being in San Francisco in July. There were brief periods where we were given partial glimpses of what were probably marvelous views on a sunny day.

We were disappointed, but felt like we saw enough of MP and officially got our fill of ruins and the Sacred Valley. Moral of the story sports fans is this: don’t go to MP in the rainy season (try March – August for better viewing).

Right now we are on a train ride back to Cusco. Brianna just had the Peruvian favorite, Inca Cola, which is pee yellow in color and tastes like bubble gum soda. Eeeeeew. Oh jeez, the train stewards just started having a fashion show. Guess what they are trying to sell…… wool sweaters and hats! Ugh. Calgon take me away………….

Ok, so I WAS on a train ride, but couldn’t get this post out until after I returned to the States. I'm BACK! The recap post of the trip will drop on Tuesday. THEN, on to the REAL South America...... the Confederate states.

Humpty said/sang it best, “Do what you like”.